The Years of the Perpetual Ponytail

The other day I was thinking, maybe I should get a haircut. I haven’t had one since I have been in Guyana (almost 7 months). I think this is the longest I have ever gone without going to a salon. My hair is long, stringy, full of split ends and utterly style-less. On some days, I long for a hairstyle. Wouldn’t it be nice to have layers or highlights? I sigh. But then I remember that I am in the Peace Corps, in a country that is at 4 degrees north latitude, almost on the equator. If you have read Tim’s blog about the weather you will know that it is not exactly a country that makes you want to wear your hair down (as it will likely stick to the back of you neck, dripping in sweat). So, on most days, you will find me with my hair in a ponytail, braid or bun. Tim jokes that these are the years of the perpetual ponytail. 

One of the things that I never thought I would miss about life in the U.S.A. is getting dolled up. Most of you know that I am not a girly-girl but I, like most people, enjoy feeling well put together. This feeling is one of the few sacrifices that Peace Corps Guyana demands one give up. I am always sweaty and I feel like I am covered in a sheen of dust and particles of burnt trash (that even now, as I write are wafting through my window). Even after I step out of my cold shower I do not feel one hundred percent clean. Today I had a Skype conversation with Heather B and, even through the pixilated web cam, she looked so lovely and clean. I think my telling her this might have creeped her out a bit. I mean, how often do your friends compliment you telling you how clean you look? 

Now, I am not complaining about my state of being. I am learning to accept that this is how most Peace Corps volunteers must feel. I am redefining myself and pushing the boundaries of what I am comfortable with, even in superficial ways. All I can do is imagine how wonderful that first hot shower in the States will feel, how amazing it will be to step into clothes that have been laundered rather than hand-washed, how confident and lovely I will feel when I can use a hair straightener and let my hair down, knowing that it won’t get frizzy and sweaty in 30 seconds. Until then, I exist in the years of the perpetual ponytail.